Dear diary,
Hi! Some weeks ago I was in the Palace Bar trying to make some money when I met Eric. He had been there for an hour or so with some friends when he came to me. He was a bit squiffy by that time. He stood me a few drinks and I accepted because I hadn't had a lot to eat that day. I was impressed by how much he drank. When I said I wanted to leave, he insisted on coming to my lodging. I didn't want him to come with me, but he was rather far gone by the time and he threatened to make a row. So I finally agreed in the hope of making some money, and also because I was a bit tipsy. Once in my room, I realised he was just a little boy in need of some affection, and I was too drunk, too tired and too much in need of money to resist...
A fortnight later, we met again at the Palace Bar. We had some drinks together, though not so many as the first time. We went to my house again, but this time we talked a bit. I told him something about myself, and he told me his name was Eric Birling and that he worked for his father's company. Is it possible that this young idler is the son of the haughty man who dismissed me from my first job here in Brumley? I can´t believe it!
At the moment I have a terrible fear and suspicion. What if I were pregnant? I would be bearing Mr Birling´s grandchild! Oh God! I cannot face that horrible man again! He won´t accept me. And anyway, I cannot marry Eric either. He is a heavy drinker and a good for nothing, and I don´t love him. I can´t spend the rest of my life by his side. This is not what I want for me or for my baby.
Oh God! What a terrible mistake to let this man into my room that night! If only I could go back in time!
But, maybe I am not pregnant. It is too early to be sure...
Oh, God, help me!!
Daisy
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